Taking the Foot Off the Gas

When you go through ‘cloudy times’ of feeling irritated, vulnerable and muted, try and bring curiosity to your inner state of being. Instead of bashing yourself up, because you’re not able to engage with life in the same way as you would during your ‘sunny times’, take a moment to reflect on what it is that is going on inside.

For example, I noticed how I perceive myself differently:

• When I’m in a positive state of mind (sunny times) and look inside, I am one with my inner being and my gaze is outwards, focusing on what I want to do. I am happy to connect with people around me, and there is no noticeable distance between myself and the outside world.

• When I’m in a muted state of mind (cloudy times) and look inside, I see myself as a person standing in the middle of an empty, circular hall. There is quite a distance to the windows all around me, through which I can see people passing by. I feel separated, isolated, vulnerable and lonely. There is a noticeable distance to myself and others.

What helps me most is to take my foot off the gas, switch gear and allow for a much slower pace to emerge. I park my projects and ambitions without judgement, and instead practise being patient and nurture myself; spending time outdoors, have a cup of tea, read a book, talk to a friend.

And so I practise adjusting to the different seasons that my inner state of being is experiencing. I allow them to come and go, and what that does is maintaining a core self-belief of worthiness. This brings freedom and space to breathe and helps me to not only be more compassionate towards myself but also to the people around me.

That's what moments of compassion look like for me. How do you practise curiosity and compassion towards yourself?