How you feel and show up today, might be different from yesterday and from tomorrow.

Inner States of Being

Connecting to Your Mind

Getting to know yourself better can be helpful in understanding why you feel or behave a certain way. Instead of telling yourself off or being disappointed in yourself, you can learn to approach this journey of discovery with gentleness and curiosity. Life is hard enough as it is, by choosing to treat yourself like a friend, it is possible to unlock new pathways of connection to yourself.

I have found this particularly helpful when I am dealing with my own mood swings and periods of depression.

By observing my inner state of being and how it changes, I was able to detect a pattern ranging from sunny times, to cloudy times, to dark times. Let me share with you what these look like and how I adjust my thoughts and behaviour accordingly to help maintain balance.

Please note: All content on this website is for informational purposes only and should not be considered professional medical advice.

Sunny Times

practice gratefulness

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seek moments of joy

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practice gratefulness 〰️ seek moments of joy 〰️

I feel surrounded by a bright, open space and I am filled with positivity and light.

I have the headspace and energy to pursue my interests and I’m able to reach out to others.

Life feels good.

Sunny times are great! They are those good times where everything feels possible and you can live your life with ease.

It is also the perfect time to introduce and cultivate good habits, seek moments of joy and practice gratefulness. The more you manage to look after yourself, the better you will be able to get through the more difficult times.

Here is a list of things that are examples of how you can nurture the connection to yourself during sunny times:

  • practice loving-kindness meditation

  • keep a gratitude journal

  • take time for self-care, i.e. facial yoga

  • learn something new

  • get on your mat for some feel-good yoga

  • nourish yourself with real food

  • connect deeply with breathing exercises

  • dare to go for a dip in the sea, or take a cold shower

TIP to PRACTICE

Keep a Gratitude Journal – Catching life’s beauty through moments of joy

At any time we have the ability to choose a moment of awareness which can connect us closer to ourselves and to life's beauty.

When I started introducing more movement to my life, I had many moments in which I didn’t feel like exercising. To encourage myself to keep going, I decided to notice one moment of joy during or after yoga practice and to write it down in my journal.

I now have a collection of them that inspire me whenever I need a little reminder why movement is good for me.

Click here to find some of my moments of joy in the hope that they may inspire you to seek yours!

Cloudy Times

practice curiosity, drop judgement

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allow compassion

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practice curiosity, drop judgement 〰️ allow compassion 〰️

It’s like a fog has decended over night, creating a muted sensation that leaves me feeling disconnected to myself as well as life around me.

I feel vulnerable towards others, I’m inpatient and easily get irritated. My mind is troubled by doubts.

Underneath it all, I can sense my worthiness and usual self; it’s just hidden, in the fog.

Suddenly and out of the blue, feelings and thoughts can show up that irritate us and leave us feeling anxious and deflated. The easiness of sunny times has passed and an inner state emerges that I like to call ‘cloudy times’.

Everything feels muted. What becomes more intense are feelings of self-doubt and disconnection.

I now understand that the best way to go through those times and be relatively okay, is by showing kindness to myself and drop judgement. By adopting an attitude like: ‘Okay, we can do this. It’s fine.’, I find myself coming out the other end feeling less drained.

Here is a list of things that are examples of how you can foster the connection to yourself during cloudy times:

  • practice RAIN-meditation

  • take time to write in your journal

  • surround yourself with nature

  • slow down

  • get on your mat for some self-care yoga

  • take time out with a cup of tea or cocoa

  • seek sun light

  • dare to go for a dip in the Irish Sea, or take a cold shower

  • come up and/or practice an affirmation that resonates with you

TIP to PRACTICE

The power of affirmations – Creating connection through curiosity and compassion

During times where you might feel irritated and lost, practicing curiosity and compassion can help to create space and stay grounded.

An exercise I find really beneficial is to find an affirmation that deeply resonates with me and recite it to myself. It can be quite powerful when done in front of a mirror, but I also like to recite it quietly in my heart whenever I need a little pick-me-up.

The aim is to find the best words you can to describe how you’re feeling, and what you’re longing for. Don’t write them in a negative way but use positive, uplifting and encouraging words that feel aspirational.

In this practice you position yourself as your friend and you adopt a voice as kind as possible to reassure yourself that all is well, that you are being seen and that you are not alone.

You can find samples of affirmations here to help you start this practice; hopefully they’ll inspire you to write your own.

Dark Times

take courage

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lean into love

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take courage 〰️ lean into love 〰️

Out of nowhere appears the cloud of darkness, everything feels heavy.

My thoughts become dark and drift to isolated places; sadness, hopelessness and despair are my companions.

No one wants to be in dark places, and yet this is where we might find ourselves sometimes. I have two images that come to mind when thinking about those experiences. One is a night sky without stars and I just keep falling. The other is like having a tornado ravaging through me, destroying everything in its path, leaving behind grey, empty wasteland. I feel raw and worn out once it has passed.

I’m grateful that over the years I was able to form alliances within myself, I have discovered a light within me and learned that by taking courage and leaning into love, I survive. In fact, I’m no longer falling without end, but have found ground beneath me, it might be grey and empty, but that’s okay.

How to nurture the connection to yourself during dark times? Try this:

  • dial down any expectations on yourself

  • glide along the surface and engage in easy activities like binge watching or reading fiction books

  • do a body scan meditation

  • spend some time by the sea or in nature

  • write about your experience in a journal or try and create a poem

  • try ‘hopping & tapping’ (Qigong practice) to release stress and tension

  • go and find a hot yoga class (highly recommended)

  • surround yourself with people you love

  • spend time in prayer (if that is an option)

TIP to PRACTICE

I dare embrace it all – Opening yourself to the beauty of life in all its varying colours

There are moments, and then there are dark moments. We can decide to embrace both and become better at cultivating inner balance by taking courage and leaning into love.

One way of getting out of a situation can be to walk right through it. It is natural that our first reaction to pain or any uncomfortable feeling is to look for a way out. But instead of running, I’d like to encourage you to stay with the feeling. It can be very liberating to experience that we can stand in the middle of a storm and be okay.

Challenge yourself and find situations that make you feel uncomfortable; you can start as small as you like: holding your yogi squat a tiny bit longer, take a cold shower, meet with people you don’t know, sit with your own feelings. When you feel tense, remind yourself to focus on your breath; over time this will help you stay more calm in stressful situations.

Practice with me the breath of Ujjayi, a pranayama technique that helps anchor yourself in the present moment, calms the mind and body, and cultivates staying cool, calm and collected in stressful situations.